Item Name & Description: a Blemmigan Secretary, an in-game item from Fallen London, donated by Failbetter Games.
The last thing you’d expect about a savage and eyeless anthropophagous mushroom is this: that those tendrils enable wonderful penmanship. The Blemmigan Secretary will be delighted to take dictation.
One of the most loved companions, the Blemmigan Secretary cannot be bought or sold at the Bazaar. They are quite tricky to obtain, as they are very rare, with a 1/1008 chance of drawing one from a Bundle of Curiosities.
Starting Bid: $50.
Bidding opens on Wednesday, May 25, 2016 at 12:01 a.m. Eastern (time zone conversions). It will close on Sunday, June 5, 2016 at 4:00 p.m. (time zone conversions, countdown) unless bids are received in the last ten minutes (learn more).
$50.
(This is a real bid, but I’m also trying to debug some weirdness with comment subscriptions . . . )
$125.
$135
Well, Cider is getting out of my range, guess I’ll try for a mushroom. $150
Ah, but I am in desperate need of a new secretary. Preferably one with a high tolerance for amatoxins… $160
I am in need of one to pen the many tragic poems that must be written of the Cider that got away from me. $170
Well then a Blemmigan would hardly suit. They are notorious smut-factories when it comes to poetry, and no amount of firm dictation can halt their sultry style. Best let me save you from what would be a great disappointment concerning this secretary. $180
(Delicious friends, you are all delightful.)
All that’s needed needed is a firm hand, And about five hundred dollars worth of irritation to take out on unnecessary flourishes. $190
One must be careful when extending a firm hand to a Blemmigan. Those fangs aren’t an ornamental affectation. And there is, of course, the potential that they’ll dissolve your liver and kidneys. As a founding member of the Mycologine school of fungal poetry, I’d be happy to let it write in its native style, no hand (firm or otherwise) required. $200
I hunt the creatures of the deep zee and a master for fun, I drink the terrifying experiments my Aunt and Mr. Wines create, I do not concern myself with simple fangs or mere liver or kidney dissolving. $210
It is hardly a matter of whether one CAN endure an extended battle of wills with one’s secretary (which I would never suggest of a seasoned campaigner such as yourself), but whether one would WANT to do so. A constant struggle with what should be a beneficial assistant seems to negate the point of the assistant in the first place. I would be remiss if I did not attempt to save you from such a fate. $220
Save me? It sounds like a wonderous distraction. A carnivorous mushroom note taker with whom I may occasionally exchange wills with sounds delightfully engaging. But I suppose we will be here all day trying to 10 up each other…. I’ll max my bid at $240
My dear Velfarre, you’ve suffered a loss this day, and while I wished for a Blemmigan Secretary to round out my fungal menagerie (already containing a Blemmigan Hat and Blemmigan Pedant), I cannot in good conscience steal it from you. I congratulate you on an auction well-won, and hope you enjoy the literal sporal fruits of your labors. Congratulations.
(You two entirely justify the decision to do the auto-extend bidding thing, because otherwise how would I get comment like this enlivening my inbox while I keep an eye on things?)
Many thanks for allowing me the secretary, and don’t worry, I too have Blemmigans it can hang around with. As a thank you tip, if the Pedant is getting to annoying, just take its glasses away, becomes as delightfully biddable as the hat. And glad to be of service while you are stuck watching it all wind down ^_^
An excellent tip, no doubt. And as Velfarre said, it has been an absolute pleasure to partake in this auction, and I’m happy to have assisted in keeping the inbox interesting. Many thanks for the opportunity, Kate Nepveu. Cheers.